Expiration, Term of Service

I can't do it.

At the last training meeting I was told I have 54 days left until my ETS - Expiration, Term of Service. I said I would re-enlist at the next drill.

But I don't think I can do it.

I'm not afraid to go to Iraq. I'm afraid of leaving my family behind.

I haven't come up with a childcare plan to even cover MUTA 6 and 7 drills next year, when we'll be gathering at the armory on Thursday evenings or Friday mornings.

I don't really trust anyone to watch my kids for me. I had a family friend watching them this summer so I could go to training, but I can't use him again. He has his own life. And besides, I don't like all the things that happened while I was gone.

I joined up so that I could train my family to let go of me, so that maybe I could do other things once in a while. But they really haven't, and I haven't been able to let go of them either.